DENVER — Local dispensary Cloudbuster Cannabis Club announced they will be closed all day today in observance of 4/20, red-eyed sources report. “I believe 4/20…
Greetings, citizens! As our great state takes the bold step of legalizing marijuana this year, I am thrilled to announce that this city will be…
AUSTIN — Self-described “cool” smoke shop Throne Room Tobacco will not require photo ID for customers who are wearing Electric Wizard shirts, bearded sources report.…
WASHINGTON – An audit of Supreme Court merchandise sales revealed that Justice Clarence Thomas pocketed roughly half the proceeds while failing to disclose said income…
TAMPA, Fla. — Murderkiller vocalist George Kostner admits he takes pride in the fact he hasn’t committed a single lyric from any of his band’s…
Heavy metal is the devil’s music. It’s written in the Bible. When you die (and if you try hard enough, when you’re alive) and you…
Long before Conor Oberst was known for posing nude on Instagram with Phoebe Bridgers’ guitar resting atop his bare dick, he was the leader of…
SYRACUSE, N.Y. — Drummer Brent Englewood of local punk band Crows and Ravens was uncharacteristically dejected after dropping one of his sticks while performing in…
“River of Dreams” was released on August 10, 1993, but The Hard Times is looking back at Billy Joel’s final studio album a few months…
LOS ANGELES — Thrash metal legend and rhythm guitarist for Metallica Kirk Hammett admitted he has serious doubts that he’ll ever be able to rejoin…
Look, if you know anything about the Dead Kennedys then nothing in this ranking will surprise you, so let’s make things interesting. I’ll list the…
Back when we were a proper country, rock stars were real men who wore spandex, fetish gear, and more hairspray than a Jersey housewife. Thankfully,…
FREDERICK, Md. – Local Punk Jake Mitchell avoided paying any federal or state taxes for the sixth straight year simply by failing to acquire even…
Most doom metal fans love weed so when we saw a guy with X’s tattooed on his hands drinking Shirley Temples at the bar before…
Thanks to platforms like social media and YouTube, selling out isn’t really a thing anymore. But back in the days when record companies had a…