James Knapp
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TOWSON, Md. — Noted anarchist and father Conor “Red” Hampton spent a wholesome afternoon yesterday teaching his 12-year-old son Dennis…
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Jordan Breeding
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WASHINGTON — The National Rifle Association demanded today fewer restrictions surrounding the purchase and use of U.S. senators, in response…
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Brooks Gray
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SANDUSKY, Ohio — Sandusky resident Brent Farrett, well-known for his racism-free skeleton, was flabbergasted yesterday by his diagnosis of “acute…
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Goodrich Gevaart
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BLOOMFIELD, Iowa — A rally for Democratic presidential candidate Bernie Sanders is entering its fourth hour of delay while event…
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Patrick Crooks
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NAPLES, Fla. — A dinner party last night was left in tatters after an anti-vaccination activist and 9/11 truther used…
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Patrick Coyne
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WILKES-BARRE, Pa. — Undercover journalist Teddy Eckart just needs to spend another two or three years investigating a lascivius and…
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ABINGTON, Mass. — Local birthday girl and outspoken anti-capitalist Beth Crowley received no birthday gifts for the third year in…
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Tom Peters
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NEW YORK — Self-described anti-fascist black metal band Ornamental Sun admitted that, although the group’s lyrics often detail horrifically violent…
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Seth Shanley
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OMAHA, Neb. — College student and “good guy” with a gun James Watson was furious today after the latest in…
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Dan Kozuh
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AUSTIN, Texas — The Whole Foods Market grocery chain announced today that it will only sell produce picked by cage-free…
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