February 2021 - Page 4 of 15

Owen Crowlie • February 22, 2021

While it seems like many people were underwhelmed by the most recent Nintendo Direct, I would like to personally thank…

Jeremy Kaplowitz • February 22, 2021

WASHINGTON — Following the successful landing of the rover Perseverance onto the surface of Mars, NASA has launched a probe…

Zach Raffio • February 22, 2021

As European technological innovation has caused countless industry jobs across the globe to become obsolete, the United States has proven…

Rachel Higgins • February 22, 2021

BOSTON — Local woman Jenna Jenkins allegedly made uncomfortable small talk with herself yesterday while self-administering a haircut at home,…

John Danek • February 22, 2021

As time goes on, I realize America isn’t the country I once thought it was. I honestly believed that work…

Jovian Gautama • February 22, 2021

NASHVILLE — Local man and cowboy boots enthusiast Kyle Wilkinson had a brief, steamy encounter with an acoustic dreadnought guitar…

Jeremy Kaplowitz • February 21, 2021

LOS ANGELES — Restaurant chain Olive Garden has teamed up with the Fast & Furious franchise to promote the importance…

Emma Jonas • February 21, 2021

PORTLAND — Anxious roommate Megan Styers allegedly adorned every door in her house with a post-it note bearing only the…

Chuck Kowalski • February 21, 2021

PITTSBURGH — Local attorney and hair metal fanatic Rourke Caldwell asked a jury this morning to consider the “landmark case…

Dan Luberto • February 21, 2021

Hey bud how’s it going? I’ll give the phone back to your mother in a second just wanted to say…

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