Shane Pauker
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OAKLAND, Calif. — Concertgoer Seth Mosley had no choice but to chew off his own foot after it got stuck…
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Matt Husser
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HORNERSTOWN, N.J. — Serial killer and torture pioneer Jigsaw was reportedly left horrified today after his unwilling Thanksgiving guests quickly…
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Sarah Cortina
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LOS ANGELES — Exclusive insider reports revealed that the eleventh film in the “Saw” franchise will feature Jigsaw torturing his…
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Alex Vlahov
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Congratulations on the newest addition to your family! As a new father, you face a classic dilemma: you want to…
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Matt Husser
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Here at the Hard Times, we’re no strangers to waking up from a drug-induced slumber in a dingy bathroom next…
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James Knapp
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Can a person simply pull themselves up by their bootstraps or is American exceptionalism a lie? We decided to test…
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Stephen Bell
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LOS ANGELES — Handsome super secret agent Angus “Mac” MacGyver easily thwarted a series of overly elaborate and ironic death…
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SAN ANTONIO — Multi-instrumentalist Eli “Smudge” Goodwin threw the entire local folk-punk scene into disarray when he tried to make…
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Jonah Nink
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I’m hardly alone in saying that 2020 was a less-than-stellar year. Instead of letting disappointment get the better of me,…
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