Zachary Wolf
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Shaving in a mohawk is one of the first things new punks do, along with buying a Black Flag cd…
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Harley Murgatroyd
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So the long nights of partying, getting wasted, and 2 am Taco Bell have taken a toll on your aging,…
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Josh Klasco
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LAKEWOOD, Calif. — Aging punk Lilo Omed claimed today that the best way to keep his penis erect is not…
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John Dixon
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ST. LOUIS — Acquaintances of chronically fatigued punk Anthony Mafodda are reportedly perplexed by the rocker’s nocturnal habit of sheathing…
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Patrick Coyne
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ELLICOTT CITY, Md. — Teenage punk and C+ student Geoff Berger was given a second yearbook photo this week to…
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Layth Sihan
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PLANO, Texas — Aging punk Jordie Farmer reportedly shaved down the sides of his back last night, creating a full…
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Patrick Coyne
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ATLANTA -— Stubborn, delusional punk Drew Blaney, who has lost a third of his mohawk due to his receding hairline,…
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Danny Taverner
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I can finally admit my mother was right about my clothing, political beliefs, and everything else I had used to…
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In our nation’s current state of total buzzkill, it’s more important than ever to focus on what makes us the…
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Ed Saincome
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KANSAS CITY – He can't find a job, his band is falling apart, he's worried his girlfriend is sleeping with…
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