The success of every truly legendary band has always hinged on their one big break. The Beatles playing on Ed Sullivan, Nirvana recording the video…
SACRAMENTO, Calif. — Local man Charlie Miller made the bold decision today to only listen to canceled bands on Spotify in order to keep from…
MACON, Ga. — After five years of paying his dues, the Trump campaign’s top merch guy Dash Howard learned today that he’ll finally get to…
AMITYVILLE, N.Y. — Local music fan Kyle Hartley was ridiculed at an outdoor Words Are Wind show yesterday for wearing the band’s COVID-19 mask he…
LEWISBURG, W.V. — The favorite shirt that you wore frequently the year you were 29-years-old magically transformed to a piece of clothing only large enough…
BURLINGTON, Vt. — Presidential hopeful Bernie Sanders announced today that he will put all of his unsold merchandise for sale on his Bandcamp following his…
OMAHA, Neb. — Local punk and part-time crafts enthusiast Mark Penderson, seeing a need for DIY face masks to help fight the spread of COVID-19,…
PROVIDENCE, R.I. — Recording artist Mitski announced today that her merchandise will now be available for sale at mental health clinics across the country, klonopin…
CHAPEL HILL, N.C. — Local man and admitted problem-drinker Gibson Leary woke up this morning with a headache, dehydration, and a CD he must have…
MONTREAL — Gildan CEO Glenn Chamandy left many people feeling vindicated today, admitting in a press conference that he has never once seen an actual…
SALIDA, Colo. — Grassroots activist organization Punks for Sustainable Merch announced yesterday the opening of a nature refuge to prevent the extinction of medium-sized band…
TEMPE, Ariz. — Local man Connor Heath still regrets breaking up with his college girlfriend 20 years on, admitting today that he never got over…