RJ Atkinson
•
NEWPORT NEWS, Va. — Local doctor, and self-described nihilist, recommended more sleep for better mood, improved brain function, and a…
Read More →
Zack Zagranis
•
BOSTON — Middle-aged punk Mickey “Goatfucker” Sullivan never thought that swallowing several pills at once would be the most mundane…
Read More →
Tim Graham
•
KOKOMO, Ind. — Local man Andrew Stoltz succumbed to an illness even though he received multiple positive reassurances online, according…
Read More →
Rob Steinberg
•
WASHINGTON — Vice President J.D. Vance suddenly woke up from a recurring nightmare in which a minimum wage employee wasn’t…
Read More →
Tim Sheard
•
NEW YORK — The medical staff at New York Presbyterian Hospital are facing allegations of medical malpractice after a botched…
Read More →
David Arriaga
•
MORGANTOWN, W.Va. — Local punk Buddy Freeman admitted that the pills he steals out of his grandmother’s medicine cabinet used…
Read More →
John Danek
•
I know that not everyone is going to agree with this decision, but the council of straight edge elders has…
Read More →
James Knapp
•
SAINT PAUL, Minn. — 37-year-old punk Ronald “Buckets” Drearer grossly exaggerated how much alcohol he regularly consumes in order to…
Read More →
Ryan Danley
•
Look at Mr. WebMd, acts like such a smarty pants. But let’s get real: you're a one-trick pony. I am…
Read More →
Kyle Sekaquaptewa
•
SEATTLE — Local woman Rachel Mendoza discovered yesterday that the entire medicine cabinet of adult human and potential partner Ben…
Read More →
