John Danek
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PEORIA, Ill. — Local guitarist Matt Carlton asked his Sweetwater sales rep today to be in his wedding as his…
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CHICAGO — Doctors at UChicago Medicine were stunned last night when Spoonful guitarist Mike Murdoch awoke from a 46-day coma…
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FAYETTEVILLE, Ark. — The singer and one guitarist of punk octet TetrisTetris surprised the other six members of their band…
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Alexandra Houle
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ATLANTA — Local metal guy and Violet Wonder guitarist Jeff Glover is “fucking terrible” at pleasuring women with his hands…
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Tom Scheve
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OMAHA, Neb. — Newly hired sound guy David Murphy was “not about to take fucking notes from some bullshit guitarist”…
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Dicky Stock
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BOSTON — Raw Sex guitarist Steve Dyer hopes to land a “fucking awesome” photo of him playing at a show…
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Gerry Todd
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TUKWILA, Wash. — Tukwila musicians of all genres are mourning today after the town’s only competent drummer, Jeffrey Joyce, announced…
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Patrick Coyne
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GRAND RAPIDS, Mich. — The guitarist and songwriter of a popular metal band was accused yesterday of using excessive umlauts…
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Ted Pillow
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LOS ANGELES — Prolific metal guitarist Buckethead finally revealed the origin of his nickname today at a press conference, settling…
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Tom K
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BALTIMORE — Researchers at Johns Hopkins University released a study today, proving that the average guitar player swallows up to…
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