ATLANTA — A group of heroic gatekeepers came together to stop the spread of a new subgenre of hardcore music that was close to gaining…
The pandemic is officially over, everyone! Much like a groundhog seeing his shadow, we have received the final sign that COVID is coming to an…
ATLANTA — The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention director Rochelle Walensky released a new set of guidelines for St. Patrick’s Day revelers prepared to…
BOULDER, Colo. — Local man and obvious liar, Benjamin Walters, who was recently diagnosed with COVID, claims to have caught at “the gnarliest show” he’d…
Hey bud, haven’t seen you around in a while, oh, you’ve been isolating! Didn’t know you could wait tables from home, ha ha. Wait, you…
Word around town is there’s an alleged shortage of at-home COVID tests. But if that were the case, how was I single-handedly able to buy…
There’s no denying the dangers of misinformation in the age of Covid, but are we pointing our fingers in the right direction? I recently came…
PIKETON, Ohio — A Dell XPS desktop computer belonging to the Piketon Public Library is starting to get nervous upon hearing reports that remote learning…
BROOKLYN — Indie rock musician Kirby Wardle would do just about anything to get a crowd at one of his shows like the one currently…
ATLANTA — Two cubicle neighbors who haven’t seen one another in over twenty-four months are basically caught up on one another’s lives in under a…
SEATTLE — Local punk Brock Riley admits that he yearns for days when he could spread every illness under the sun to his friends without…
ATLANTA — A terrified passenger aboard flight 1894 to Portland expressed slight relief today in noting that the creature on the wing of his plane…
Covid has killed over 700 thousand Americans since the beginning of 2020. Unfortunately, my beloved uncle Lee became another statistic last night. I appreciate the…
NORFOLK, Va. — Local man and self-proclaimed “Roganite,” Connor Patterson, admits to being open to a variety of expert opinions and science facts, as long…
So you’re feeling a bit under the weather after a recent motorcycle rally. Should you take a Covid test? Why bother! Those tests are about…