ASHEVILLE, N.C. — Chronically unemployed man and frequent HPV spreader Danny Feldman is completely unaware that his last three girlfriends all consider dating him to…
TORRANCE, Calif. — Longtime punk and father Al Diaz thoroughly interrogated his teenage daughter’s new boyfriend last night about which five Black Flag songs are…
SANTA FE, N.M. — Local mother-of-three Melissa Trayne suggested “one photo without the girlfriends” today, implying they may not want some of the women in…
PACIFICA, Calif. — Local boyfriend Sam Logan is “not even close” to providing the frequency, duration, and intensity of Instagrammable moments required to keep his…
LOS ANGELES — Perpetually unemployed boyfriend Liam Womack announced yesterday that he will cease failing to author novels to pursue procrastinating on writing screenplays, apprehensive…
SAN DIEGO — Local punk Kelsey Hernandez insisted yet again today that her new, non-punk boyfriend is “more of a loose cannon than he appears,”…
PORTLAND, Ore. — Friends of local man Jeremy Torres are unsure if his new girlfriend Laura Kelly is incredibly laid back or in desperate need…
AUSTIN, Texas — All-around nice guy Ken Ludlow has reportedly found himself in another long-term relationship with a woman despite his wanting to “just be…
MINNEAPOLIS — Laura Reynolds discovered her ex-boyfriends tag last night in the bathroom stall of local venue the 331 Club, effectively ruining her evening and…
Anyone who knows me, knows that I’m an ally, I’m a feminist, and I’m woke. That is why I’m shocked and appalled that I have…
TEMPE, Ariz. — ASU student Shelly Campbell has started dating local realtor Aaron Jackson two months after breaking up with longtime boyfriend Eric Johnson, who…
TOLEDO, Ohio — A lovelorn man was surprised to see that he had been “ghosted” by Love Bubble Yeah!—a dating sim he had been playing…
Game of Thrones is back and once again things are tense in Westeros. Almost as tense as they were when you asked your boyfriend to…
As a modern day feminist, it’s very important to me that I support other women. No woman should ever be shamed for having sex with…
LOS ANGELES — Graduating high school senior Cheryl Dowd announced she has no plans to port what has so far been a successful relationship with…