MADISON, Wisc. — Derek Carlson surprised his girlfriend Jessica Kravtsova today with the gift of allowing her to make all of the couple’s Valentine’s Day plans for the second year in a row, according to sources.
“Things have been pretty stressful at work for my special lady, and I know nothing relaxes her more than planning something and diving right into a new project,” said Carlson while balancing a plate of corn dogs on his lap. “I wanted to show Jess I appreciate her, and I realized the best possible gift was to let her do something that makes me feel appreciative.”
While Carlson is usually “down for whatever,” he was quick to point out that whatever Kravtsova wanted to do is “totally chill” and “good by me.”
“I think she enjoys how flexible I am when it comes to plans. Like, if she wants to reserve the Airbnb, pack my bags, find someone to feed our cats, rent the car, buy groceries, plan recipes, and figure out fun events to do in the area, that’s cool,” Carlson stated. “She’s so much better at this stuff than I am. I’m terrible with booking websites and things like that. My vibe is more just like a super laid-back guy who goes with the flow.”
For her part, Kravtsova, a hospice nurse and world’s most patient person, isn’t terribly disappointed by the news as she’s become adept at keeping expectations as low as humanly possible.
“Derek isn’t a bad boyfriend. He’ll go out of his way to do nice stuff for me all the time: just yesterday he took out the trash & recycling. And the week before that, he also took out the trash & recycling,” Kravtsova explained, clearly struggling to think of other examples. “Sure, it would be great if he took some initiative in planning things, but know if he did we’d just be eating Jimmy John’s while rewatching ‘Sons of Anarchy.’”
For his beloved’s birthday, Carlson is allegedly planning on paying back his share of the rent and filling up the kitchen sink so that the last week’s worth of dishes can soak for a few days.