PALO ALTO, Calif. — A hot new startup company just launched a revolutionary weather app for aging punks that lets you know if it’s cold…
JACKSONVILLE, Fla. — Local punk Wynn Hall updated their resume yesterday evening to include “selling plasma” following a long history of selling their own bodily…
PHILADELPHIA — Determined woman and job applicant Patricia O’Malley is creatively pursuing work that she’s technically overqualified to do by acting like a man who’s…
LAKE FOREST, Ill. — Prospective game writer Evan Richards quit halfway through a job application to an independent game studio this morning, complaining it had…
OMAHA, Neb. — Local job seeker Brenna Reed updated her resume to include “proficient at Photoshop” roughly two minutes into a 5-hour tutorial on the…
SACRAMENTO, Calif. — Local gamer Kayla Stephenson reportedly included various video game skills on a job resume in an attempt to look more professional. “As…
SAN MATEO, Calif. — Mobile technology programmers laid out plans yesterday to incorporate a feature into every app that would enable users to swipe left…
TULSA, Okla. — Local white student Tiffany Copeland took part in an ancient rite of passage today, effectively transforming into a full-blooded Native American by…
CHICAGO — A paper wristband used to denote patrons of legal drinking age was applied in an appallingly lackluster fashion during a show last night…