BOSTON — Local straight edge father Maurice Puckett was depressed upon realizing he would have to say he was going to the corner store for…
FREDERICK, Md. — Amateur skateboarder and recovering alcoholic Jude Gannon achieved a longstanding career goal of acquiring a sponsor in the form of an Alcoholics…
“The Wire” is considered the greatest show of all time, besides all those other shows that are also considered the greatest of all time. Despite…
CHAUNCEY, Ohio — 11-year-old Boy Scout Albie Tamari is reportedly just one cigarette away from earning the highly esteemed Nicotine Patch to add to his…
Sometimes in the punk scene, a friend will take the partying too far and all you can do is be supportive when they get clean.…
Chances are, you’re familiar with Daffy Duck. At time of writing, the funny fowl has been splitting sides over the course of an astounding 83…
PALO ALTO, Calif. — Several weeks into a Stanford University study measuring the addictive nature of video games, participant Aidan Whaller told sources he was…
BECKLEY, W. Va. — Recent Philidelpia transplant Abigail Kingaby is currently making rounds to visit several friends, all buried among local graveyards, during a trip…
FORT COLLINS, Colo. — Health-conscious punk Stacey “Skaggs” Bellamy will no longer drive her rusted-out cargo van to purchase illicit substances, but will instead bike…
EUGENE, Ore. – A local fuck-up is hopeful this morning that the nutrients from his half-consumed Synergy Gingerberry kombucha will be more than enough to…
In the faced-paced world of today most folks want to become addicted to something, but just don’t know where to start. Luckily, when you look…
FAIRBANKS, Alaska — Obvious alcoholic and general mess of a human being Jerrold Long announced today that he will spend the entire evening, and the…
RENO, Nev. — Local man and former alcoholic Richard McCann allegedly considers himself “totally sober” now, after switching the focus of his addiction from alcohol…