EARTH — Punks around the globe who are unsatisfied with oppressive global systems designed to benefit a few powerful individuals at the expense of everyone…
The end of the year is a great time to reflect on all that’s happened in the last 12 months, be that to reminisce on…
Metal is all about precision. The meticulousness of a face-melting solo, the accuracy of a complex repeated riff. The exactness of a relentless blast beat.…
SUN VALLEY, Nev. — Local man and occasional masturbator Harrison Weber was disgraced after receiving his “2021 Pornhub Wrapped” late yesterday morning, which outlined all…
KALAMAZOO, Mich. — Local punk Abigail Burton was forced to confront the ways her listening habits reflect her deeply pathetic personal life after a white…
We asked and you voted! Meet The Hard Times Sexiest Man Alive 2021: Slimy the oppossum! At 2-and-a-half years old, Slimy has been through the…
PENSACOLA, Fla. — Snake trainer Trevor Bloch raises his anacondas and other snakes to not judge potential mates by physical appearance but rather the contents…
Everyone knows it’s hard being a teen. Between school and acne, being a teenager in America is almost as hard as being a pre-teen in…
ARVADA, Colo. — Local guy Nathan Thorpe is having an “absolute fucking banner” year, thanks to his penchant for explaining the details of fast-paced current…
PRIDE ROCK — Dozens of hyenas still loyal to Scar attempted and ultimately failed to retake Pride Rock in a deadly coup following the defeat…
While 2020 was a huge year for gaming, we really missed out on some key site traffic by choosing to publish our Game of the…
LOUISVILLE, Ky. — Local crust punk Skye Mathtison is leaning hard into self-help culture for 2021, pinning pictures of his deepest desires of the dirtiest…
We have had fun tonight with our festivities and frivolities and, while your proposition to keep this night going is tempting, I believe now is…
BOSTON — Local straight edge couple Alana Enders and Chris Lewis responsibly celebrated New Year’s Eve alone at home for the eighth consecutive year, sources…
2020 has been the worst year of my life, slightly beating out 2019, which surpassed 2018. Actually, now that I think about it, every year…