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Our Favorite Albums of 2021 to Listen to on the Bus to Avoid Talking to This Guy Who Really Wants to Talk To Us

The end of the year is a great time to reflect on all that’s happened in the last 12 months, be that to reminisce on bad memories we’d sooner forget, or to remember the good times that make us grateful to be alive for just a little bit longer. For many people, listing the best new music that came out this year is a great way to recall the ebb and flow of time, and for us, listening to our favorite albums of 2021 is a great way to avoid making eye contact with this guy on the bus who’s definitely trying to get our attention.

Here’s our favorite albums of 2021 that are not only great to listen to but are also pulling more than their share of weight in getting us out of hearing what his dude thinks about climate change.

  1. The Stimulators, ‘Loud Fast Rules’
    The first album to make our list is literally the first thing we could find after we put my headphones in to signal to this idiot that talking is off-limits. We’re sure this album is great, but we honestly have no idea. Either way, it’s definitely our favorite thing ever to happen right at this second as this guy is definitely looking at a rash or something on his arm and sort of coyly looking over here but in an inviting way. Not only do we not want to be anywhere near anyone’s rash, we also don’t wanna be on the hook for giving a total stranger faulty medical advice — it could be serious and we just can’t have something like that hanging over our head. No thanks.
  2. Sunami/Gulch split
    OK, this one is a little faster which is exactly what we wish this fucking bus would start doing ASAP. We’re pretty sure rash dude can hear the music coming from our headphones and is fake-headbanging and we just want to go home. We got a single strand of hair wrapped around our toe before we got our socks on and we weighed taking our shoes and socks off and handling it all day and we don’t know why we didn’t but we just really need to take care of this now.
  3. Quicksand, ‘Quicksand’
    We’re not sure if the bus is some sort of wormhole portal where hints aren’t taken the same way they are in the regular universe, but this guy is incredibly persistent and has now moved to the seat directly across from us. Which brings us to our third pick. Is this album actually from 1990 and so isn’t really a new release in 2021? Yes, but 1990 is exactly how far back in time we wish we could go so maybe we could have made some slightly different choice, resulting in a butterfly effect-like series of events that would put us on the 6:12 bus instead of this one. Why didn’t we bring a book?
  4. Sleater/Kinney, ‘Path of Wellness’
    We truly don’t know how much longer this ride could possibly be. This is more new music than we’ve listened to since we were 16 and still found joy in things. If he thinks staring at us non-stop, only to look slightly off to the side and pretend to look at something the second we catch him is going to work on us, he’s got another thing coming. We should, however, thank him, for if not for this little maneuver we might have missed the business card of an injury lawyer tucked into the window a few seats over, which we may or may not need for reasons our future lawyer probably thinks it best we don’t discuss at this time.
  5. Cannabis Corpse, “Left Hand Pass’
    Alright, we’ve just decided to take off our headphones and blast Cannabis Corpse straight from our phone while we stare back at this guy until one of us reaches our stop. We’re not actually high right now, but public transportation always makes us feel like we are anyway, so why not lean in.

Happy new year, may yours be merry and solitary and come without unwanted attention.