2020 Tag Archives - Page 2

Stephen Bell • November 3, 2020

WEST PALM BEACH, Fla. — First Lady Melania Trump was apprehended by Florida election officials this morning after being caught…

Bobby Korec • November 3, 2020

CHICAGO — Historically undecided voter Gunther Wexler waited eight grueling hours yesterday to cast a “protest” vote for Harambe, the…

Jeremy Kaplowitz • November 2, 2020

ROCHESTER, N.Y. — Local voter Martin Frost does not actually want video game character Waluigi to be president, despite writing…

Nariko Ott • October 30, 2020

WASHINGTON — Republicans across the country are drawing up new state maps in a desperate attempt to confuse voters and…

Mo Mozuch • October 23, 2020

SAN JOSE, Calif. — Developers at Supergiant Games reportedly cannot pinpoint why their hit game Hades, about a man attempting…

Mark Roebuck • September 9, 2020

PHOENIX — Despite his entire social circle being overcome with anxiety, dread, and financial instability for most of the calendar…

Ryan Werner • September 4, 2020

SAN FRANCISCO — The oft-ridiculed snare sound from Metallica’s 2003 album “St. Anger” announced yesterday that it will also run…

The Hard Times Staff • August 27, 2020

WASHINGTON — RNC Chair Ronna McDaniel announced today that the fourth night of the Republican National Convention will feature wall-to-wall…

Jeremy Kaplowitz • August 5, 2020

BLOOMINGTON, Ind. — Experts warned today that listening to the hit Mountain Goats song “This Year” is no longer enough…

Ryan Harnedy • June 15, 2020

WASHINGTON — Republican Party sources claimed today that they are in possession of a potentially damning episode of “Room Raiders”…

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