Well, well, look who decided to finally call! Oh yes, I’m sure you’ve been very busy. Of course I’m being sarcastic, you think I don’t…
Hey man, great set the other night! You really knocked ’em dead. I know you’re probably wondering why you didn’t see me out there and…
I saw your flyer. You know, the one for the show that’s three towns over with the vague set time that can be anywhere from…
Spend enough time scrolling through Instagram or aimlessly clicking through Pinterest boards and you’ll see all kinds of advocacy for something called “quiet confidence,” where…
Many regard the 1980s as the golden age of pop music. Many popular songs of the decade laid the foundation for the mindless, cash-grabbing, soulless…
I know Kiss gets a pretty bad rep. Yeah, they have legions of “fans” who probably only like them for being a real-life Saturday morning…
Imagine watching the rich history of your people bastardized by a clueless and indifferent public and then being expected to go along with it because…
I’m a real one, bro. Been around since back in the fucking day. So when my little brother wanted to see Sum 41, I was…
Whether they say it outright or not, people who claim to enjoy Nu-Metal in 2023 are only saying so because of nostalgia. Hell, they aren’t…
Just about every study reveals that 9 out of every 10 Americans are unsatisfied with where they are in life. But there’s good news! It’s…
Hey, you little non-neon-colored pissbaby. You want to take my beloved Pipeline Punch, huh? You think my Monster Energy consumption is so concerning? Well, good…
Alright, I want everyone to just settle down. I realize many of you find this unorthodox, but let’s focus on the facts. Yes, this man…
Saturday is for the fucking boys, of course. It’s a day for drinking, hanging, partying, and all other things related to “bro-ing out.” It’s a…
World hunger is something my mother made sure I was educated on from a young age. With one simple instruction, she would sum up the…
Well, hello there, Kingy. Say, why so glum? What reason could a heavy metal master and servant to Satan like yourself possibly have to be…