Matt McInerney
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INDIANAPOLIS — Local amateur guitarist Bryant Stafford reportedly slammed his laptop shut after merely glancing at the non-standard tuning of…
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John Danek
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WHEELING, W. Va. — Unemployed hardcore punk singer Lyle “Coccyx” Plant is seeking employment with a resume consisting solely of…
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Joe Rumrill
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CORSICANA, Texas — The recently hired roadie of touring a capella collective Vox On The Run is flabbergasted that he’s…
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Bobby Korec
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NEW YORK — Local barista and music know-it-all Nathaniel Pellson claimed he knew Canadian band Nickelback long before they weren’t…
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NEW YORK — Republican Representative-elect George Santos is facing more scrutiny about his personal life after overwhelming evidence began to…
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Chris Bowen
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ORLANDO, Fla. — A new long sleeve shirt design for death metal band Gorebomb is confusing fans with its overwhelming…
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SPRINGFIELD, Mass. — Local maniac Cole Kristoff openly admits he prefers the most recent releases from his favorite metal band…
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Chris Bowen
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CHICAGO — Several Doctors at Rochester University School of Health Sciences were left with a few questions Saturday after examining…
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Chris Jones
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TOPEKA, Kan. — Local guitarist Austin Henderson is reportedly fed up with his father calling his lifelong dream of making…
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James Knapp
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DOVER, Del. — Struggling power-thrash band Boot Full of Piss recently sat down to a predictably cheap dinner made up…
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