Michael Gursky
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DENVER — Customers of local hotspot SlashCheese, a metal-themed pizza shop with a fittingly grungy exterior and blaring metal playing…
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Nathan Kamal
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FORT LAUDERDALE, Fla. — Legendary rock band Weezer surprised audiences at this past weekend’s Ugly Sweater Festival when their set…
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Patrick Coyne
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HURSTBOURNE, Ky — Local technophile Dean Espinosa made yet another fucking pencil holder after needlessly blowing $10,000 on a 3D…
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Dan Kozuh
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BUFFALO, N.Y. — Forty-two-year-old heavy metal fanatic Jason Higgins shocked bar patrons earlier this week by ordering a Jack Daniel’s…
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Joanna McNaney Stein
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SAN FRANCISCO — Local man Dominick Campbell exited a port-o-potty he described as a “crime scene level disaster” and gave…
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Robert John Scucci
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SEATTLE — Newly engaged couple Daryl Stein and Hannah West are absolutely livid that their celebratory post got significantly less…
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Jus Kaplan
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BOSTON — Local landlord Viktor Lind used his precious time and resources to add a fresh coat of paint to…
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Khadija Hassan
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NEW YORK — Local punk Than Luethke reports that the majority of his caloric intake comes from the free wine…
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Ryan Danley
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CUPERTINO, Calif. — Executives at Apple TV responded to “an overwhelming amount of customer demands” by announcing that their network…
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Matt Kennedy
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CORPUS CHRISTI, TEXAS — An overloaded barge containing nearly fifty thousand gallons of coconut oil spilled into the Gulf Of…
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