James Knapp
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HARRISBURG, Penn. — Local human disaster Jason Melvin recently managed to pull a complete 180 in every aspect of his…
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Dave McNamara
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BOSTON – Local business owner Shawn O’Connell was surprised to discover that a majority of the personal references provided by…
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Patrick Coyne
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GLENSIDE, Pa. — Pennsylvania senate candidate John Fetterman vows to support universal healthcare for scene veterans, old heads, and all…
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James Knapp
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MEMPHIS, Tenn. — New Jersey-based punk, and massive acid enthusiast, Lionel “Tabby” Winnet is reportedly “confused but going with it”…
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James Knapp
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SEATTLE — Thirty-seven-year-old father Peter Goodman recently sat down with his son, Jamiroquai, to explain the intimate mechanics of sexual…
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Freelancer
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LOS ANGELES — The completion of the fourth season of “Stranger Things” left Americans yearning for a simpler time when…
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Tim Graham
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WASHINGTON — Senate minority leader Mitch McConnell reportedly spent the week in a luxurious DC hotel while the coffin he…
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Sam Eardley
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Oh, you like the "Stranger Things" soundtrack, huh? Yeah, it's pretty nice. Modular synths, analog warmth — you've got to…
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WASHINGTON — U.S. Marshals discovered a mysterious package outside of the Supreme Court which was later revealed to be an…
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Jose Balderas
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LOS ANGELES — Representatives from Neutrogena announced they finally perfected a formula strong enough to be certified as “Goth-Strength” by…
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