On the outside it seems like I have it all: Unlimited access to input chords, wah-wah pedals, and the Guitar Center corporate Slack channel. It…
Last weekend, I was thrown out of my favorite bar for being “too aggressive” after attempting to throw a chair at someone who said I…
Alright, I’ve got this. I’m prepared. Rolling up to the regularly scheduled orgy with my clean STD test, 700 or so condoms, some Lubriderm just…
Happy National Ska Day, everyone! That’s right, today we’re commemorating everyone’s favorite Afro-Caribbean-turned-suburban-American horn orgy, ska music! And, by the way, there’s no point in…
Dinner with parents. For some, a fate worse than sitting through Andrew Lloyd Weber’s “Cats.” But fear not, with the help of sweet, sweet marijuana…
Personalities can be hard to cultivate. Many people find the self-awareness, honesty, and leg work involved in developing them to be daunting. Luckily, life provides…
Growing up, there were local shows at teen centers, VFWs, and in friends’ basements nearly every weekend. My parents retired to Palm Lagoon, a shitty…
These days it seems like every class graduating from college is more entitled than the last. Do these kids honestly think their student loan debt…
I love reminiscing about the good old days. Like in fifth grade, when I totally dunked on Owen Krevsky when a bird took a dump…
I often find myself disorganized, tired, and way behind on various tasks and projects. I complain about it often, and I started to get really…
You don’t need to spend much time in the smoke shop or the sex shop to know about the numerical significance of both “420” and…
I’m a sales rep for a storage solutions company which isn’t too bad as far as jobs go, I’m just on the road a lot.…
I’m the first to admit my band’s set last night was bad. Guitar solos were flubbed, vocals were way off key and the only pocket…
I’m in a bit of a pickle here. Ever since I picked up guitar at 13 and subscribed to Guitar World magazine, I’ve obsessed over…
Those of you who have been asking for a Maroon 5 review are in luck, and also, go fuck yourselves. This past weekend we accidentally…