Finally, a victory for public health! This week, the American Psychological Association announced a long overdue partnership with YouTube to help reach those who need therapeutic intervention the most: people listening to “slowed + reverb” versions of songs.
“Anyone who intentionally seeks out YouTube content in which music is ‘slowed to perfection’ clearly needs psychological attention,” explained Dr. Powell Klein, a psychiatrist hired as a medical expert for the program.
“Maybe they’re going through a hard breakup, or feeling stressed from school. Or maybe they’re just beaten down by the daily burdens of existence. Regardless of the reason they turned to ‘slowed + reverb’ content, it’s a glaring red flag. No one listening to Joji on .75x speed while a cyberpunk anime gif loops on the screen is mentally well.”
Here’s how the groundbreaking health initiative works: If someone searches Youtube for slowed versions of songs, manually slows down the song speed in video settings, or enters depressing qualifier titles such as “[song] playing in another room and it’s raining,” YouTube will immediately route that person to professional psychological care.
If they don’t have a therapist saved in their computer contacts, connected devices, or website cookies, YouTube will directly link the ailing individual to a complimentary video session with a licensed therapist or social worker. However, follow-up sessions will require a subscription to YouTube Premium.
“One thing that makes our program so innovative is that it will use AI to triage patients based on risk,” added Dr. Klein. “For example, our algorithm has learned that anyone who clicks on slowed songs from Lil Peep, XXXTentacion, or Lana Del Ray should automatically skip ahead in the queue. They need the most immediate care, and we recognize that.”
Dr. Klein added that anyone who seeks out sped-up versions of songs will be prescribed medicine for ADHD from the program’s online pharmacy powered by Google.