Patrick Coyne, Author at HARDTIMES

July 21, 2019

WASHINGTON — Presidents Donald Trump and Bill Clinton both denied reports today claiming they were backstage at Warped Tour ’97…

July 21, 2019

BECKETT RIDGE, Ohio — Suburban punk Adam Kincaid spotted yesterday an unopened, full price and unexpired package of Sargento string…

July 20, 2019

EVANSTON, Ill. — A group of friends who have been “practically inseparable” since their freshman year of high school are…

July 19, 2019

DETROIT — A group of squatting punks became unwitting participants in the eternal struggle of man-versus-nature last week, as each…

July 19, 2019

JACKSON, Miss. — Loyal Smiths fan Jaden Woods is desperately pushing a conspiracy theory that the real Morrissey died decades…

July 16, 2019

NEW YORK — An alarming new study conducted by a research panel of angry baby boomers found that 82% of…

July 13, 2019

KANSAS CITY, Mo. — Guitarist Loyd Schneider raced back and forth between two different venues last night after booking shows…

July 12, 2019

BALTIMORE — Self-proclaimed beer snob Jeremy Drika pretended last night to thoughtfully peruse the beer list at a local brewpub…

July 8, 2019

BOSTON — A legendary and possibly mythical mosher was allegedly spotted last night enjoying a four-course French meal in the…

July 8, 2019

TUCKER, Ga. — Punk Ollie Boyer turned around a framed photo on his nightstand last night of punk rock icon…

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