Tour Pre-Sale Code Allows Fans To Get Shittiest Seats First
LOS ANGELES — Ticketmaster’s latest pre-sale for the Now That’s What I Call Music Tour allowed concertgoers to register for…
Read More →
Jose Balderas
26 stories found
Isolated Fat Mike Vocal Track Used in CIA Torture Sessions
WASHINGTON — Recently declassified documents outlining various so-called “enhanced interrogation” techniques used by the CIA during the War on Terrorism…
Read More →
New Fall Out Boy Song Breaks LiveJournal Attempted Log-In Records
SAN FRANCISCO — Executives at the formerly popular blogging platform LiveJournal report that their website experienced a sudden spike in…
Read More →
Ghost Intern Has Trouble Identifying Nameless Ghouls Lunch Orders
LINKÖPING, SWEDEN — Local college student Lufsig Nilsson once again screwed up the lunch orders for the Group of Nameless…
Read More →
Opinion: Maybe the Sun Should Cut Back on Starbucks and Save Year Round
Like clockwork, here comes the Sun telling us we can go back to “Standard Time” as if it’s doing us…
Read More →
Uh-oh: I Forgot To Take the Bernie Sticker off My Harley Before Arriving at Sturgis
One of the rites of passage of being a Harley-Davidson owner is taking a trip up to Sturgis, South Dakota…
Read More →
NPR’s Tiny Desk Acquired By Live Nation
WASHINGTON — Live Nation, the largest entertainment promoter in North America, paid an undisclosed amount of cash to buy the…
Read More →
Creeping Mortality: 60 Minutes Is Now Catering To My Interests
Remember when your parents would watch 60 Minutes? You knew it was the end of the weekend. It symbolized the…
Read More →
Neutrogena Releases Goth-Strength Sunscreen
LOS ANGELES — Representatives from Neutrogena announced they finally perfected a formula strong enough to be certified as “Goth-Strength” by…
Read More →
Only White Dude at Cinco De Mayo Party Hitting Piñata Little Too Hard For Everyone’s Comfort
LOS ANGELES – Local man Salvador Gunez was alarmed and concerned following the aggressiveness with which his friend Seth Richter…
Read More →