Despite being a major campaign promise, student debt cancellation of any kind was noticeably absent from President Biden’s recently proposed…
Read More →
HOLLYWOOD — Shortly after its acquisition by Amazon, MGM and Eon Productions announced this morning that the next James Bond…
Read More →
CHICAGO — Local bassist Tim Bolz announced this morning that he has “still got it” after remembering how to play…
Read More →
My son’s hazing death was tragic and terrifying. No parent should ever have to bury their child. But was it…
Read More →
Lowering infection rates, more vaccinations and a healthy crowd of people inside Applebee’s can only mean one thing; Quarantine is…
Read More →
Much like TV, ice cream, and porn, pets exist solely to distract us from the inevitability of death. Well, until…
Read More →
DENVER — Local Weezer fan Andy Chaplin ate mosquitos, lampreys and other parasites off of local Pantera fan Chad Stern’s…
Read More →
LOS ANGELES — Local Boy Scout Matthew Bolz allegedly did not realize that the old woman he aided across the…
Read More →
WASHINGTON — Capitol security officials announced this morning that the inauguration of President-elect Joe Biden will be secured by 25,000…
Read More →
Alright shithead, listen up. I put on my little song and dance about how much I like your band’s new…
Read More →
