James Knapp, Author at HARDTIMES

March 29, 2021

Okay so this is all still a bit strange, and frankly we’re still very hungover, but let us give you…

March 18, 2021

AUSTIN, Texas — Local 20-somethings Ashton Knoll and Kevin Stohl were approved yesterday for a second mortgage on their fiddle…

March 13, 2021

TACOMA, Wash. — Local 33-year-old Darrell Ornsby realized yesterday that “the universe is a lie and life is a joke”…

March 11, 2021

LINCOLN, Neb. — Scene members held a candlelight vigil last night for Gary Johnson, the still-alive merch guy for punk…

February 17, 2021

TAMPA, Fla. — Ronnie “The Neck” Garefino, the virtuoso guitarist for the speed metal band Fisting Frankenstein, is admittedly “totally…

February 2, 2021

DENVER — Newly single man Chris Fangerburg held a moment of silence for his former relationship today, lowering the toilet…

January 16, 2021

LOS ANGELES — A study from the TV ratings conglomerate Nielsen found that Americans spend an average of 12% of…

January 4, 2021

CUMBERLAND, Md. — Residents of local punk house the Couch Arsenal rotated the only ashtray on the premises yesterday to…

January 2, 2021

LEMOYNE, Penn. — Roommate and all-around jackass Glen Sullivan reportedly drank the last beer in the house moments after having…

December 28, 2020

KNOXVILLE, Tenn. — Regal Cinemas CFO David Ownby asked his friend and HBO Max subscriber Richard Lansing yesterday to please…