Opinion: I Think I Can Hold It ‘Til After the Encore August 27, 2021 Okay, I’m cool. Sure I’ve had 11 PBRs on an empty stomach, but there is no way I’m gonna be… Read More →
Inaugural Class of Merch Guy Hall of Fame Just Nine Dudes All Named Phil August 27, 2021 SECAUCUS, N.J. — The newly created Merch Guy Hall of Fame announced its inaugural class of inductees consisting entirely of… Read More →
Small Town’s Punk Scene Consists of High School Drama Club and Weird Guy Who Works at the Dump August 24, 2021 WEDGEBERG, Wyom. — A recent census of the town of Wedgeberg, population 629, revealed that its fledgling punk scene is… Read More →
Opinion: It Has a Collar, Which Means My Mighty Mighty Bosstones Bowling Shirt Counts as Business Casual August 23, 2021 Some truths feel so obvious it almost seems absurd to think you’d ever have to explain them, let alone defend… Read More →
Opinion: “Sound Guy” Is a Sexist Term. Women Can Be Needlessly Irate Control Freaks Too! August 20, 2021 I can’t believe that "sound guy" is still a socially acceptable thing to call someone. What year is this, 2004?!… Read More →
Stoic Punk Stands In Middle of Pit Like a Mighty Redwood, Unconcerned and Immovable by Nature and Time August 15, 2021 ATLANTA — Local punk Rodney Tobleson reportedly stood completely still with arms crossed in the middle of the pit during… Read More →
Free Show Not Worth It August 8, 2021 ROCHESTER, Minn. — A free show held at the recently reopened coffee shop Jittery Jill’s Caffeine Cave was reportedly “not… Read More →
Touring Band Stops to Pay Respects at Tomb of the Unknown Bass Player August 2, 2021 ARLINGTON, Va. — Pop-punk band Soul Skaters made a brief stop during their East coast tour recently to hold a… Read More →
Game Night Transitions Pretty Seamlessly Into Orgy August 1, 2021 DALLAS, Penn. — A recent board game night hosted by small town resident Curly P. Johnson evolved with alarming ease… Read More →
6 Ways To Get Out of a Speeding Ticket That Are All Just Punching the Cop and Running Away July 20, 2021 We’ve all been there. You’re blasting Mötley Crüe’s greatest hits while cruising at 80 mph through a school zone when… Read More →