Goth Secretly Craving Funfetti Cake
TOLEDO, Ohio. – Local goth office worker Todd Schmidt admitted privately that he is secretly craving a slice of the…
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Doug Kolic
106 stories found
I Wonder If My Music Students Would Think I’m Cooler Knowing How I Fucked And Sucked My Way Through The Local 90s Ska Scene
Man, I wish these students knew how cool I used to be! It’s no secret that they don’t give two…
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Punk Can’t Decide Which Shoulder Rat Should Be His Plus One
BROOKLYN, N.Y. — Local punk Johnny ‘Blades’ McPhee expressed dread this week after being forced to choose between which one…
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Crowd Not Sure if Drummer Engulfed in Flames Part of Show or Not
TORONTO — Concert goers were left baffled last night when drummer Gareth McGibbons of mathcore band Hyde Index burst into…
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If Stolen Valor Is So Bad Then Why Did It Get Me a Better Seat at This Restaurant?
At ease, soldier! Just kidding, I know you’re not in the military. Don't tell anyone but neither am I. But…
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If Stolen Valor Is So Bad Then Why Did It Get Me a Better Seat at This Restaurant?
At ease, soldier! Just kidding, I know you’re not in the military. Don't tell anyone but neither am I. But…
Read More →