Page 27 – HARDTIMES

November 3, 2020

CONSHOHOCKEN, Pa. — Local black metal band Nocturnal Defacement announced their public support yesterday for the “greater of two evils”…

November 3, 2020

CHICAGO — Historically undecided voter Gunther Wexler waited eight grueling hours yesterday to cast a “protest” vote for Harambe, the…

October 25, 2020

Fellas. Have you ever been in a situation where she just wasn’t feeling your flirtatious advances? Me neither. Evidently, it’s…

October 22, 2020

NASHVILLE, Tenn. — A belligerent swarm of locusts unexpectedly stormed the presidential debate stage on Thursday landing directly on Donald…

October 22, 2020

As card-carrying Democrats, it’s important that we always take the moral high ground in response to our opposition’s reprehensible actions.…

October 18, 2020

Your typical video game mascot will tell you right away in their name if they are an animal. For starters,…

October 17, 2020

BOSTON — Local straight edger Pete Westpan is generally apathetic about National Edge Day falling on a Saturday this year,…

October 15, 2020

As we’ve all learned first hand from our uncles at any family function, alcohol can have a devastating effect on…

October 8, 2020

Time to take a fucking stand, people. You are either a dog person: loyal, social, and agreeable. Or you are…

October 7, 2020

ZZ Top are well known for their slew of hits that my uncle listens to when checking out Harley Davidson…