NBC Adds “Chicago Hardcore” to City-Themed Lineup April 21, 2024 LOS ANGELES — NBC announced they would be expanding its One Chicago universe this fall by focusing on the punk… Read More →
Target Celebrates Record Store Day with 35 Different Versions of Taylor Swift’s “The Tortured Poets Department” April 20, 2024 MINNEAPOLIS, Minn. — Retail conglomerate Target announced today that they would be participating in Record Store Day by offering 35… Read More →
Was Your Loved One Killed by Ten Million Pounds of Sludge From New York and New Jersey? You May Be Entitled to Compensation April 19, 2024 Attention Boston area residents! Was one or more of your loved ones killed by ten million pounds of sludge from… Read More →
Man Trying Raw Meat Diet Hoping Debilitating Salmonella Part of the Process April 15, 2024 INDIANAPOLIS — Local man Dave McGrath is clinging to hope that contracting salmonella is part of the process of the… Read More →
Pig Suspecting Punk Only Adopted It for His Kidneys April 12, 2024 ASHEVILLE, N.C. — A domesticated pig found his life in jeopardy as he began to suspect his punk owner Kevin… Read More →
Opinion: Some of You Never Had to Duct Tape Your Discman Shut in High School and It Shows April 12, 2024 It seems like wherever you look these days, we’re surrounded by people who’ve never known a minute of strife, let… Read More →
CEO Calls All Hands on Deck Meeting to Tell Employees About Cool Band He Discovered, Also Massive Layoffs March 26, 2024 PALO ALTO, Calif. — CEO Steve Westwood of tech juggernaut SnaxR called an emergency all-hands-on-deck meeting to excitedly inform employees… Read More →
Child of Broken Up Polycule Looking Forward to Six Birthdays and Christmases March 25, 2024 SYRACUSE, N.Y. — Eight-year-old Chase Gibson was optimistic after the dissolution of the polycule that had raised him since birth… Read More →
Man Humiliated at Karaoke Bar After Forgetting Lyrics to Daft Punk’s “Around the World” March 25, 2024 MINNEAPOLIS — Local man Jeff Abrams made a complete ass of himself after blanking on the lyrics to Daft Punk’s… Read More →
Study Finds More Americans Taking on Second or Third Mid-Life Crises March 24, 2024 WASHINGTON — A recent study conducted by the Census Bureau revealed that the majority of Millennial Americans are forced to… Read More →