October 2019 - Page 7 of 18

Heartwarming: Pregnant Woman Gives Up Subway Seat to Gamer Playing Switch

Pat Cavanaugh • October 21, 2019

NEW YORK — Rebecca Sheenan showed there’s still kindness in the world when she gave up her seat to a…

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All Ages Get Up Kids Show Still 21 And Up

John-Michael Bond • October 21, 2019

NASHVILLE — An all-ages show last night featuring emo pioneers The Get Up Kids was still a 21-and-up event when…

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Guy Tacks on “Music” to End of Instagram Username After Buying Guitar From Target

Erin McLaughlin • October 20, 2019

MARION, Ill. — Local man Billy Harrison amended his Instagram username yesterday from “billyharrison” to “billyharrisonmusic” immediately after purchasing a…

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Horse Probably Fine

Ella Gale • October 20, 2019

IMPERIAL CITY, Tamriel — MolagMoProblems, a dark elf who has not seen her beloved piebald destrier Fuckstick since she galloped…

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Goth Girl Will Have You Know Pagans Invented Fall

Anna Walsh • October 20, 2019

ALLSTON, Mass. — Teachers and students at Allston High School were enthusiastically told moments ago by goth classmate Willow Bates…

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Top 10 Blink 182 Songs That – Ok Now That the Boomers Are Gone, How Do We Get Rid of Them Permanently Before They Destroy the Planet?

Jonah Nink • October 20, 2019

Nothing beats a good Blink 182 song, here is our top 10 list. 10. Mutt - This Enema of the…

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Stretch of Highway Adopted by Hardcore Crew in Absolute Disarray

Rick Homuth • October 20, 2019

DENVER — Members of local hardcore crew Mile High Wolfpack adopted a stretch of highway last month, which has since…

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Boycotting Porn With Female Characters Sends Gamer on Journey of Self Discovery

Andy Holt • October 19, 2019

LINCOLN, Neb. — In the months since launching a personal boycott of all “politically correct” pornographic material featuring women of…

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Poser Outed After Spelling Descendents with an “A”

Kevin Tit • October 19, 2019

CINCINNATI — Local punk Jon Weiner was outed as a poser yesterday after mistakenly spelling the name of popular punk…

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P.C. Police Plant “Coexist” Sticker on Man’s Car

Parker Newman • October 19, 2019

AUCKLAND, New Zealand — P.C. police officer Patrick Doyle was caught on body cam last night planting a “Coexist” sticker…

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