Parker Newman, Author at The Hard Times

City With Dog for Mayor Bans Fireworks

By Parker Newman

BANGOR, Maine — Mayor Chesty the French Bulldog enacted a city-wide ban today on fireworks ahead of Independence Day festivities, citing public safety concerns, environmental…

Accidentally Unrecorded Podcast Just Useless Heartfelt Conversation

Accidentally Unrecorded Podcast Just Useless Heartfelt Conversation

By Parker Newman

SACRAMENTO, Calif. — An episode of the mental health podcast Forgetting Sarah Tonin went unrecorded this week due to technical difficulties, leaving nothing but a…

Breaking: Man Still Using Line 6 Amp to Be Tried as an Adult

Breaking: Man Still Using Line 6 Amp to Be Tried as an Adult

By Parker Newman

SACRAMENTO, Calif. — Courts ruled today that 32-year-old Justin Evans will be tried as an adult on murder charges despite owning a Line 6 amplifier,…

Hard Times Podcast Network

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Episode 7: Contributor/Musician Jordan Breeding

This week on The Pitch Group we talk with Hard Times contributor and senior writer at Cracked.Com, Jordan […]
Goth’s Not Dead

This week on Fanboys, the guys rush to the defense of a beleaguered Bruce Springsteen, reluctantly crown a second Hall […]
Do You Princess Toadstool Take This Koopa…?

Today’s episode makes a whole bunch of no sense. Mario and Luigi go fishing, even though they have plans to go to […]
The Hard Times Podcast w/ Walter Delgado

Matt and Bill are joined by Rotting Out’s Walter Delgado to talk about prison and weight training. You know, […]
Episode 6: Hawaii Punk with Kevin Tit

This week on The Pitch Group we talk with stand up comedian and musician Kevin Tit. From Hawaii, to Germany, to […]

Opinion

Opinion: Do You All Hate Me?

Opinion: Do You All Hate Me?

By Nick Ortolani on June 30, 2019

Like, seriously. I’m asking honestly, do you all hate me? I don’t know, maybe I’m just being paranoid but I sometimes feel like you’re all talking behind my back or...

Opinion: No, You Forgot the Fucking Aux Cable

Opinion: No, You Forgot the Fucking Aux Cable

By John Danek on June 26, 2019

I can't believe we're finally heading to Ozzfest! We've been talking about this for years and it's finally happening. Where else can you find the taint-shaking talents of Rob Zombie,...

Opinion: I’m Just a Girl, Standing in Front of a Boy, Asking for His Birth Time

Opinion: I’m Just a Girl, Standing in Front of a Boy, Asking for His Birth Time

By Krissy Howard on June 23, 2019

Hey you. It’s me. I need to ask you something and I hope you’ll be honest with me. I know you’ve been hurt before by people who are quick to...

Opinion: Miles Davis Played Ska

Opinion: Miles Davis Played Ska

By John Danek on May 21, 2019

Virtuoso. Iconoclast. Visionary. Ska pioneer. These are just some of the terms used to describe legendary jazz/ska trumpeter Miles Davis. He never once confined himself to the boundaries of genre...