Love him or hate him, it’s hard to deny that Quentin Tarantino is one of the most influential auteur filmmakers of the last 30-plus years.…
LOS ANGELES — Acclaimed film director Sam Mendes announced that his ambitious portrayal of the Beatles, which will be told through four separate films focusing…
To any and all Hollywood butt-chuggets that might be reading this: Hi. You probably don’t know me. I didn’t go to AFI, I’ve never won…
Our Uncle Hewlit was never the brightest bulb in the box. He’s the sort of guy who is highly susceptible to conspiracy theories like QAnon,…
Alright, look, so the last month has been really difficult, okay. We got behind on some projects. We had couples therapy to miss. We had…
The year was 1992. I had just clocked out at Spencer’s Gifts and walked across the mall to catch the next showing of “Aladdin.” Robin…
CHICAGO — Local goth couple Caleb and Adrienne Simmons recently decided to break the news to their children that Jack Skellington is not real, sources…
For many of us, the task of cultivating the tastes, opinions, and dispositions that constitute an earnest human personality is just too daunting. Luckily the…
The holidays are upon us, and we’ve been getting cozy with some of our favorite classic films to get into the spirit. While stumbling across…
Christmas season is here, and that makes it the perfect time to revisit the Disney holiday classic “The Nightmare Before Christmas.” It’s the touching story…
Congratulations on the newest addition to your family! As a new father, you face a classic dilemma: you want to spend time with your child…
ARLINGTON, Va. – Girlfriends across the US recently announced their newfound enthusiasm for seeing a three-hour movie in theaters thanks to “Taylor Swift: The Eras…
HAZLEHURST, Miss. — Indie horror movie “The Scary Place” is leaving primarily Republican audiences in freshly shitted-and pissed-in pants due to its terrifying, uneventful depictions…
LOS ANGELES — The Motion Picture Association of America announced they would not grant the upcoming Willy Wonka prequel a PG rating if a scene…
WASHINGTON — Local punk exorcist Benicio “Scary” Scaramucci admitted he didn’t see any problems with the sinister child threatening nuns and puking everywhere when asked…