HEAVEN — The almighty being who created the heavens and earth, God, admitted today that it’s actually kinda gay to create guys if you think…
Remarkable! Men never touch other men when they are navigating through a crowded bar, but if there’s a woman in the way, there’s no chance…
CAMBRIDGE, Mass. — Years of clinical research has found that, on average, female bands playing local shows receive only 78 percent of the exposure paid…
BROOKLYN, N.Y. — Local punk Chelsea Bowers is reportedly preparing for what will surely be several rounds of involuntary music trivia before leaving the house…
CHICAGO — Climatologists are blaming record-low temperatures for the steep decline in Year-Round Shorts-Guy populations, resulting in a massive shortage of exposed, hairy, mid-winter calves,…
CINCINNATI — Recently formed punk rock band The Broke Scabs has caught the attention of many within the local scene for their bold lineup choice…
“WHOOOOOWEEEEEEAAAAAGHHHHH!!!!!” Uh oh! We’ve all heard that excruciating whine that comes out of a poorly-positioned amplifier or a male audience member heckling a female musician. Feedback…
SCOTTSDALE, Ariz. — Local women found conclusive evidence that God doesn’t know what they want, sources confirm, based on the existence of Chad Tuckers, the…
PORTLAND, Ore. — Self-described feminist and all-women’s art collective manager Aaron Fanning is definitely hiding something, according to reports of “consistent” and “creepy” vibes about…
BERKELEY, Calif. — Polyamorous man Rick Walcott is reportedly enlightened and open-minded enough “to love multiple people” but instead chooses to love only himself, according…
Over the years the punk rock community has always advertised itself as inclusionary to people of every gender expression, race, or sexuality. Yet, it is…