Shane Pauker
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LONDON — The City of London has awarded longtime resident Charli XCX the Key Bump to the City, sources confirmed.…
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Dan Rice
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WASHINGTON — In light of recently released emails between Jeffrey Epstein and Ghislaine Maxwell that mention Donald Trump by name,…
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Tim Sheard
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LOS ANGELES — Well-known idiot Donald Robertson was beside himself with amazement when ChatGPT was able to produce an unexceptional…
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Samuel Abraham
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At The Hard Times, we’re constantly confronting the existential quandaries that come with aging. Perhaps you, too, have resorted to…
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Tim Graham
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BURLINGTON, Mass. — ICE agent Wayne Almeida attempted to pick up women at a local bar by showing off his…
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Steve Packosky
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Oh man! My Bumble date with this girl Rachel was going great, but then she looked at her phone and…
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Zachary Wolf
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GRAND JUNCTION, Colo. — The entire population of nearby Mesa Springs was killed after a roundabout was installed in their…
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Dom Turek
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Major change is the result of millions of seemingly insignificant endeavors converging. As a community, we can minimize waste and…
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Zachary Wolf
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JUPITER, Fla. — A new feature in your vehicle’s GPS now measures distance in the time it would take you…
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Charles Bill
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CHICAGO — The Bulletin of the Atomic Scientists shocked the world today with an announcement that their most chill scientist…
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