Hardcore Tag Archives - Page 426

Rose Vineshank • April 4, 2020

BALTIMORE — Quarantined family man Arti Hagelstein succumbed today to both boredom and the exotic allure of Thelkkphegorg, the sleep…

Brendan Kelly • April 4, 2020

DETROIT — Citing growing health concerns, Insane Clown Posse’s Shaggy 2 Dope and Violent J announced yesterday the first ever…

Noah Leavy • April 3, 2020

PORTLAND, Ore. — Local polyamorous woman Maris Seitman is now well aware of the misstep she made when choosing to…

Krissy Howard • April 3, 2020

NEW ORLEANS — Self-care experts around the world suggest that everyone try to take a break from the frequent stress-crying…

Kyle Sekaquaptewa • April 3, 2020

BOULDER, Colo. — Local crust punk Aaron Beckman compromised his health this week when his self-made coronavirus facemask inadvertently exposed…

Jonah Winchester • April 2, 2020

CHICAGO — A panel of experts practicing social distancing across the country are reeling today, following the discovery that it…

Dan Rice • April 2, 2020

MADISON, Conn. — Local dad Elliot Chapman announced today that, in addition to keeping six feet of physical distance to…

The Hard Times Staff • April 2, 2020

ALBANY, N.Y. — Local promoter Steve “Froggy” Fordham stole a substantial portion of his daughter’s cereal this morning to help…

Jerrod Kingery • April 1, 2020

BURBANK, Calif. — Production on the FOX reality show “LEGO Masters” was halted indefinitely today after some asshole stuck all…

Noah Leavy • April 1, 2020

SALT LAKE CITY — Longtime Imagine Dragons fan Katie Graham celebrated her 11th birthday this week with a dull celebration…

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