BUFFALO, N.Y. — Darren Freed met privately with his “best friend since junior high” early this morning to ask him to delete thousands of songs…
WASHINGTON — Scientists have confirmed that the current nationwide dumpster fire is adversely affecting the national crust punk population, according to a new study conducted…
IRVING, Texas — The Pizza Time Players, the animatronic band featured for decades at the Chuck E. Cheese arcade and pizza chain, was blacklisted yesterday…
CHICAGO — Local curmudgeon Benjamin Dahl reaffirmed his decades-old “punk is dead” stance shortly after procuring tickets to the It’s Not Dead Fest, according to…
CHICAGO — Rumors persist that Riot Fest still has one last high-profile reunion to announce: the NFL champion 1985 Chicago Bears, raising the expectations of…
CINCINNATI — Recently formed punk rock band The Broke Scabs has caught the attention of many within the local scene for their bold lineup choice…
CHARLOTTE, N.C. — Local grandmother Dolores McComb is offering chicken as the “cruelty-free” option for tonight’s homemade meal, according to sources dreading the dinner. McComb…
OK listen up: I’ve been going to hardcore shows since before you were in diapers. And if there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s that if…
LOS ANGELES — Local writer/director/producer/aspiring barista Judd Apatow has been turned down time and again for entry level positions at every coffee shop in town,…
BERKELEY, Calif. — Walmart’s “unbeatable” low prices were reportedly crushed last quarter by seminal DIY venue 924 Gilman Street’s in-house snack-and-zine shop, according to several…
COLUMBIA, S.C. — Fans attending a punk show at the Screaming Lizard last night encountered a solitary male whose arms appeared to be permanently crossed…
SPRINGFIELD, Ill. — Katelyn Paskin suffered a minor concussion earlier today after losing consciousness in a severe asthma attack, despite a tattoo on her wrist…
NEWPORT, Ore. — When local punk Greg Denny looks directly into the sun during today’s eclipse without the aid of solar filters, it will likely…
LOS ANGELES — The California Film Commission has legalized hunting aspiring documentary filmmakers in order to control their rapidly growing population, effective immediately, according to…
OAKLAND, Calif. — Musicians of all genres met last night at the Cava Java Cafe to save a beloved mixed-media open mic from being taken…