GREAT BARRINGTON, Mass. — Smashing Pumpkins frontman Billy Corgan stood up to speak last night at an assembly about the current state of the education…
KIRBY, Wyo. — Local woman Madison Fuller announced today via multiple social media platforms that she is expecting to be a MILF sometime around mid-June…
HOMER, Ala. — The emotional affair between English teacher Lara Palledorous and her co-worker Allessandro Reyes resulted in a sweaty, purely physical and entirely literal…
LIVONIA, Mich. — A group of punk Christmas carolers regretted their choice to include The Misfits’ classic “Last Caress” in their repertoire after it was…
ST. LOUIS — Acquaintances of chronically fatigued punk Anthony Mafodda are reportedly perplexed by the rocker’s nocturnal habit of sheathing each individual point of his…
LOS ANGELES — Local woman Shelby Walsh announced yesterday that she’s “turned over a new leaf,” rebranding her tumultuous personal life as “her journey,” several…
VACAVILLE, Calif. — Local Papa Roach fan Danny Herman scurried out of a Circle K this morning in apparent good health, despite being decapitated in…
DALLAS — Singer-songwriter and registered sex offender Wilfred Barton announcded his first tour dates at a press conference held yesterday afternoon since pleading guilty to…
NORMAN, Okla. — A surprising new study found that it’s way easier to just change your password every time you login instead of trying to…
YOUNGSTOWN, Ohio — Disturbed federal agents confirmed today that local punk and well-known exhibitionist Angela Meyers has removed the little piece of green tape that…
NORTHAMPTON, Mass. — Frontman for hardcore band XjaundiceX and local scene legend Al Harrell spent the past week trying to convince his partner Lily Vallee…
CHAPEL HILL, N.C. — Local man and admitted problem-drinker Gibson Leary woke up this morning with a headache, dehydration, and a CD he must have…
IRVINE, Calif. — Virtually every single punk attending the Bucket of Dog Shit record release show today is terrified everyone else will find out about…
COLUMBUS, Ohio — 41-year-old punk Kaira Rojas is concerned her new drug dealer is ripping her off, paying increasingly high prices for medication she needs…
SLEEPY HOLLOW, N.Y. — Dying punk Anthony Mafodda is reportedly on his deathbed today at Phelps Hospital and ready to utter his final words, but…