Joe Rumrill
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WILLOW WIND HOLLOW — The animal population of a wooded glen was less than surprised when their mayoral election results…
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Charles Bill
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PORTLAND, Ore. — A local couple’s hike was put on hold after a really neat stick was found on the…
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TIGARD, Ore. — Reports indicate that urban sprawl and logging are decimating the forest preserves that once teamed with teenagers…
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Rob Ryder
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HARRISBURG, Pa. — Fans of black metal stalwarts Bloodfrost became disenchanted with the supposedly Satanic quartet when it was recently…
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Kyle Stanley
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BELO HORIZONTE, Brazil — A team of explorers recently discovered a previously unheard album by heavy metal band Sepultura hidden…
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Ben Friedman
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AUBERRY, Calif. — A local woodpecker, ignoring the desperate pleas of parents, continued to go completely apeshit on a tree…
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CARVER, Mass. — Local metalhead Tyler Kearns admitted that the replica Viking sword he brought on his camping trip might…
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Mark Roebuck
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UNDERGROUND LAIR, Ang. — Sources confirm everything was going according to the dark prince Dacucard’s wicked plan last night, as he…
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