RAHWAY, N.J. — Local punk Matt Gerricks shared this week that, despite his commitment to the punk genre and lifestyle, he does like that one…
Last weekend, I paid a visit to my local cinema complex to see James Gunn’s comic book-inspired adventure romp, “The Suicide Squad.” And I must…
NEW YORK — Compassionate Queens native Kacey Mora selflessly volunteered her time to help bathe actor and infrequent washer Jake Gyllenhaal, sources close to the…
DETROIT — Supposed diehard Slayer fan James Denninger was released from prison this weekend much earlier than expected due to good behavior, confirmed shocked and…
LANCASTER, Pa. — Longtime “Jackass” fan and father of three, Kyle McGarvin, believes he is finally mature enough to recreate some of the show’s most…
ALBANY, N.Y. — Avid sneakerhead Jeremy ‘Choice Kicks’ Santini reportedly died inside when first time homeowner Michael Beatty instructed all party guests to remove their…
Look, I know that these days everyone goes around acting like they’re President of the Sodom and Gamera fan club. I see their merch everywhere,…
CHICAGO — Every member of local indie rock band The Soviet Reunion is far more artistically, financially and personally invested in their respective solo projects…
HEMPSTEAD, N.Y. — Fans of hardcore and nu-metal announced a peace agreement after finding common ground in their mutual love for seminal post-hardcore band Glassjaw,…
EL PASO, Texas — Post-hardcore band Asbestocide reportedly sold out what little cred they’ve obtained by not including free swag such as stickers or buttons…
BERKELEY, Calif. — ‘90s alt-rock band Counting Crows finally announced the subject of their hit song “Mr. Jones” is none other than Dr. Henry Walton…
SACRAMENTO, Calif. — Multiple residents of California filed a class action lawsuit against any bands who included new material on a “Greatest Hits” compilation album,…
INDIANAPOLIS — Discerning merch buyers and dedicated fans of band doing pretty well for themselves, Stay Swell, were pleased to discover that affordably priced bootleg…
Let’s face it. Complaining online about new Weezer material is just part of the human experience. It usually occurs between early and middle adulthood, according…
Internet Can’t Fucking Wait to Push Newly Famous Artist to Psychological Ruin
SEATTLE, WA — Internet commentators and online communities announced this morning that they are “fucking stoked” to push recently famous musician Hank Todd past the…