MOORPARK, Calif. — Local charitable punk Branden Shaffer helped raise an unprecedented number of individual cigarettes during a holiday donation drive, according to coughing sources.…
So you’ve decided today is the day you knock off your neighborhood pawn shop in order to repay some debts you accrued while in prison.…
HAMPTON, Va. — Some stupid-ass bitch with her head up her ass who cut me off coming down Jefferson just pulled into the animal shelter…
AUBURN HILLS, Mi. — Major US automotive company Chrysler announced that its new 2022 line of vehicles were as big as a whale, and fully…
BALTIMORE — Friends of local mom-to-be Vivian Wilburg have been taking advantage of her mandatory sobriety and using her as a designated driver since her…
TORONTO — A local fire truck en route to a fire reportedly honked and blared its siren despite there being no vehicles obstructing its path…
We’ve all been there. You’re blasting Mötley Crüe’s greatest hits while cruising at 80 mph through a school zone when some nosy State trooper decides…
DALLAS — Local white man Darrell Hargrove raised alarm bells yesterday after a traffic incident led experts to believe his mugshot may soon appear on…
NEW YORK — Producers of “Fox & Friends” announced today that they will move the popular news show from its regular shooting location in Rockefeller…
MILTON-FREEWATER, Ore. — Chaos erupted after a Ween drive-in show late last night, as every single showgoer tried to find somebody still capable of safely…
ENTERPRISE, Ala. — Local guitarist and small-town punk Jill Keeley is planning an hours-long drive across state lines today in order to support her local…
BALTIMORE — A three-hour road trip to Baltimore was just long enough for passenger Doug Sepp to have a turn controlling sound system despite his…