PORTLAND, Ore. — A new, punk-themed bed & breakfast that offers the “luxury of living like a real life punk” requires that renters bring their…
BATTLE CREEK, Mich. — Following criticism of the Overwatch themed breakfast cereal’s initial release, Kellogg’s announced that their Lucio Oh’s cereal has received a massive…
KALAMAZOO, Mich. — Margery Watson’s annual Mother’s Day breakfast-in-bed was obstructed by her unsightly ventilator due to complications from an advanced case of COVID-19, depressed…
RICHMOND, Va. — Local punk and self-proclaimed scene veteran Rory “Iceman” Phillips was denied a free Grand Slam at Denny’s this morning, a perk the…
FORT WALTON BEACH, Fla. — A bowl of overnight oats successfully converted last week into a barely recognizable “glob of total shit” nearly one month…
AUSTIN, Texas — Indie-rock band The Goonie Squad was “thrilled” by the chance to go unnoticed by two dozen hungover, apathetic industry leaders during SXSW’s…
HARTFORD, CT – In a disturbing display of antisocial behavior, local psychopath Chaz Milwall bragged to coworkers that he routinely eats traditional breakfast entrees for…