ERIE, Pa. — Local gamer Glenn Rice reportedly purchased both Nate Silver and Nate Gold versions of the 2020 presidential election forecast in order to…
CHICAGO — Historically undecided voter Gunther Wexler waited eight grueling hours yesterday to cast a “protest” vote for Harambe, the gorilla who was infamously murdered…
NEW YORK — A visibly desperate and agitated President Donald Trump loaded his IMI Desert Eagle handgun today and travelled to Manhattan’s 5th Ave. to…
As an aspiring pastor, I wish that people were always asking me if I believe Donald Trump is a Godly man. If they did, I…
WASHINGTON — Republicans across the country are drawing up new state maps in a desperate attempt to confuse voters and secure President Trump’s re-election, confirmed…
STEVENS POINT, Wisc. — Undecided voters across the U.S. are racking their brains this week trying to decide whether to burn crosses or simply nail…
DENVER — The entire state of Colorado hid 500 tons of legal marijuana in a building-sized Altoids tin prior to a campaign visit from former…
SALT LAKE CITY — Vice Presidential hopeful and former California Attorney General Kamala Harris switched off the debate camera Wednesday night, obscuring crucial footage of…
WASHINGTON — The Biden-Harris presidential campaign website was updated this morning with a promise to fund more Black-owned prisons, in response to protests calling for…
Is there anything better than an ice-cold beer? I don’t know about you, but at the end of a hard day, or when the impending…
CLEVELAND — Moderators for 2020’s first Presidential debate reportedly added a question regarding an issue that’s been hotly contested since the early/mid-2000s: What defines “real”…
JACKSON, Mich. — Rock‘n’roll legend Ted Nugent blasted Presidential candidate Joe Biden in an open letter today after the presumptive Democratic nominee played Nugent’s classic…
WASHINGTON — Republican Party sources claimed today that they are in possession of a potentially damning episode of “Room Raiders” featuring Democratic Presidential candidate Joe…
WASHINGTON — Notable Alzheimer’s awareness organization Sundown Movement officially endorsed former Vice President and Democratic nominee Joe Biden this morning, stating the candidate “exemplifies their…
With the economy tanking and unemployment skyrocketing, we at The Hard Times realized it may have been misguided to assume the country would elect a…