HOUSTON — Veteran obstetrician Brian Lein spent upwards of 10 minutes yesterday indifferently tugging on a patient’s newborn in an attempt to untangle the rat’s…
COLUMBIA, S.C. — Former Vice President Joe Biden’s campaign is reeling today after the Democratic contender reportedly kissed a baby square on the lips while…
BOSTON — In the second quarter of 2016, local married couple Jonah and Sasha Figueroa announced they were starting development on a baby. After nearly…
ANN ARBOR, Mich. — Perpetually pie-eyed local man Dominic “Mitch” Wozinski was invited last night by expectant parents Christine and Sam Pinner to unwittingly test…
TRENTON, N.J. — Part-time dad and full-time punk Cody Heckyls discovered yesterday, when seeking flu remedies for his two-year-old son, that Pedialyte offers a kid-friendly…
JEFFERSON CITY, Mo. — Local punks and new parents Desi Stark and Darion Foster look forward to using their newborn baby Shea as the perfect…
COLONIAL HEIGHTS, Va. — Parents Pat and Misty Santohir reportedly told friends that, while they did not regret having their daughter Jacyln, they didn’t really…
CLOVIS, N.M. — In recognition of a typo made by a friend in a group chat, Kenny Boskins has named his firstborn son Sellular Dada…
GRAND RAPIDS, Mich. — Married couple Dave and Sarah Dyer allegedly conceived and birthed a newborn child on purpose within the last year, subsequently horrifying…
SEATTLE — Vertex Solutions employee and local bassist Gretchen Garcia is leading the fight to expand paid leave to musicians wanting to spend time with…
CINCINNATI — Newly expecting couple Darren Herzberg and Emily Snyder are excited for childbirth purely to gain a new person they can force to play…
I know what you’re thinking and, yes, I am a baby. Let’s get past that. It’s fair to wonder whether I should even be allowed…
SKOKIE, Ill. — Local parents Laura and Sam Conner learned yesterday that their first child, born just this past Sunday, is already out of iCloud…
LONDON, England — A giant, nearly two-meter long baby was flown over London Square today, prompting confusion and outrage among local residents. The controversial appearance…