Patrick Coyne
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BETHESDA, Md. — Local woman Tabitha Wicksham is “not at all worried” about her husband sleeping with groupies during his…
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Gary Doyle
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CHICAGO — Local pervert Tommy Webster was surprised to discover yesterday a band named after mannequin pussy, his favorite fetish…
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Freelancer
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EL PASO, Texas — The legal team at Williams & Ruprecht was stunned today when a seemingly normal stack of…
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Kyle Stanley
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KINGSTON, Jamaica — An ocean liner hosting the 311 Caribbean Festival Cruise struck a reef off the coast of Jamaica…
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Bobby D. Lux
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In my current search for employment I see job postings seeking a “Rockstar Candidate” every day. At first I thought…
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John Danek
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PALMETTO BAY, Fla. — An already shirtless Iggy Pop tightly crossed his fingers and paced anxiously during the team selection…
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Daniel Magorrian
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HAMILTON, Ontario — Neil Peart’s elaborate drum kit is set to be divided up and donated to schools across Canada…
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Shea Strauss
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I used to be a God-fearing man. A real fire-and-brimstone buff. But my faith in God aged just as poorly…
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John Danek
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DETROIT — Local bar/glam rock band Stiletto Devils, who cite fellow Detroiters Kiss as their sole influence, “suck ass” at…
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Teri Donahugh
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WATERLOO, Iowa — Christian rock superfan Keri Wilson has resolved not to go backstage after any concerts until she is…
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