Kyle Stanley
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MINAS TIRITH — The White Council of the Wise issued a decree today that all fellowships in Middle Earth shall…
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John Danek
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WASHINGTON — Calvin, the co-star of the influential newspaper comic strip “Calvin & Hobbes,” was arrested today in conjunction with…
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James Knapp
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Listen up you capitalist dogs! We’ve been looking at this whole pandemic thing all wrong. Sure, right now the coronavirus…
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Louie Aronowitz
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NEW YORK — The startup company Punk Blue Apron is enjoying a surge in popularity, thanks to their monthly subscription…
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Ted Pillow
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ALLENTOWN, Pa. — Quarantined father Chris Denny is struggling with his son’s 33-piece jigsaw puzzle after drinking almost an entire…
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Dan Kozuh
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ATLANTA — Fate Embrace merch guy Edgar Byrd stood aimlessly behind his kitchen table for hours earlier this week in…
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Charles Bill
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DALLAS — Quarantined man Forest Whitlock was struck with a feeling of great anxiety today upon seeing Rod Serling, host…
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Ted Pillow
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NORTHPORT, N.Y. — 17-year-old Alex Powell’s LSD stash was flushed down the toilet moments ago and will be replaced with…
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John Danek
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WEST CHESTER, Pa. — “Jackass” star Johnny Knoxville followed COVID-19 hygiene guidelines yesterday by sanitizing a shopping cart before riding…
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Dom Turek
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NEW YORK — Local man Bryan Watson spent his 28th birthday last week quarantined from friends and family due to…
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