Culture Archives - Page 148

Self-Conscious 12 Foot Tall Skeleton Lists Height as 14 Feet on Hinge

Ben Friedman • October 28, 2023

SPOKANE, Wash. — A 12-foot tall Home Depot skeleton found himself under a mountain of skepticism after listing his height…

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16-Year-Old Unsure if He’s Too Old to Start Skating

Bex Kane • October 27, 2023

CONCORD, N.H. — Local high schooler Colin Black recently expressed interest in learning to skateboard but has serious reservations because…

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Cutting Edge AI Successfully Isolates John Lennon’s Abuse From Rest of Legacy

Max Barth • October 26, 2023

LONDON – Just hours after announcing a "new" Beatles song enabled by artificial intelligence, the surviving members of the seminal…

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Wedding Venue Demands Merch Cut

Dan Vanderpool • October 26, 2023

CHARLOTTE – Local newlyweds Sarah Jones and Doug Tayler were caught off guard towards the end of their wedding celebration…

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Alarm At 4:20 Not So Funny During Trial

Charles Bill • October 25, 2023

CHICAGO – Local stoner Matt Reed recently discovered that his daily alarm at 4:20 p.m. wasn’t received well during his…

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Mark Wahlberg Claims Alaska Airlines Flight Was Saved Thanks to “Daddy’s Home 2” Playing as In Flight Entertainment

The Hard Times Staff • October 24, 2023

LOS ANGELES — Actor Mark Wahlberg believes the off-duty Alaska Airlines pilot who tried to take down a plane mid-flight…

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Commander Biden Bites All 221 House Republicans, Seizes Speakership

Ryan Dondero • October 24, 2023

WASHINGTON — Commander Biden, President Joe Biden’s two-year-old German Shepard, reportedly bit every single Republican in the House of Representatives…

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15 Drugs Ranked by How Likely They’ll be Legal in Colorado Next Year

Courtney Hill • October 24, 2023

Back in 2012, while the rest of the country was still content to decriminalize small quantities of marijuana or prescribe…

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The Directions of this 2000s Party Anthem Were Unclear and Now I Actually Just Burned This Club to the Ground

Malia Simon • October 24, 2023

Uh-oh: tonight at the club they were playing some 2000s bangers that advocated for “burning this place to the ground,”…

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Guy Playing Air Guitar With Broom at Work Unaware How Much Rat Shit Now on His Hands

Chris Bowen • October 23, 2023

ELMIRA, N.Y. — Local Wendy's employee Jared Snyder was blissfully unaware that the broom he had picked up to play…

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