Dan Vanderpool
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November 22, 2023
ANAHEIM, Calif. – A pair of local hardcore lovebirds announced they reached the Disneyland stage of their relationship after several…
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Jack Humphrey
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November 21, 2023
AUSTIN, Texas — Adrenochrome “Addy” Jones, the five-year-old German Sherperd owned by far-right conspiracy theorist Alex Jones, claims to have…
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James Knapp
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November 21, 2023
NEW YORK — A new choose-your-own-adventure horror book intended specifically for individuals in their mid-thirties entitled “Halfway To the Grave”…
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Sarah Cassell
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November 21, 2023
WASHINGTON – Local punk Rene Johnson was absolutely gobsmacked and quite offended after he got a Slack notification from his…
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Holden Klym
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November 20, 2023
Thanksgiving! A great way to kick off the season of spending dreadful amounts of time with your relatives, making small…
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Chris Bowen
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November 20, 2023
CORTLAND, N.Y. — Local millennial Jacob Horwitz felt nostalgic for a time when corporate rental giant Blockbuster moved into his…
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Zachary Wolf
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November 19, 2023
PUEBLO, Colo. – Local downer Henry Bergen recently stopped going through the motions of pretending to wash his hands after…
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Tim Graham
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November 19, 2023
DAVENPORT, Iowa — Local delinquent Christine Pritchard surprised friends and family when she somehow obtained a prescription for cigarettes, according…
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Alex Kitsinger
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November 18, 2023
DENVER — Colorado Judge Sarah Wallace ruled on Saturday that former President Donald Trump did in fact incite the January…
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Bibek Gurung
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November 18, 2023
RICHMOND, Va. — Diehard moderate Harold Quigley caused a stir in both the conspiracy theorist and scientist communities with his…
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