Patrick Coyne, Author at HARDTIMES

January 27, 2019

ROCKVILLE CENTRE, N.Y. — 21-year-old Marcy McDaniels voluntarily lied about her age last night to get backstage at a show…

January 3, 2019

CARBONDALE, Ill. — Local punk Steve Friedmann is preparing himself for winter by installing heavy-duty, stainless steel snow chains on…

December 17, 2018

CINCINNATI — 30-year-old Dylan Barker was shocked to learn he was the father of an 18-year-old chatbot, the result of…

December 7, 2018

Pere Noel. Kris Kringle. The Winter Easter Bunny. For centuries, children have lined up to meet Santa Claus and ask…

November 13, 2018

LOS ANGELES — Sports-themed dance music mix Jock Jams apologized to the seminal punk rock series Punk-O-Rama yesterday for relentless…

November 9, 2018

PHILADELPHIA — Fans of indie-rock band To Jupiter were disappointed and disillusioned last night when a stripped-down, acoustic version of…

November 5, 2018

BROOKLYN, N.Y. — Senior VICE editor Archie Jenkins sprinted from his office in Williamsburg yesterday after remembering he coerced a…

October 29, 2018

Jonathan, I want you to know that I love your mother very much. And although I tried to eat your…

October 18, 2018

DAYTON, Ohio — Wise punk elder Jerry “Solly” Solowicki was asked to mediate this week between two bands that each…

October 14, 2018

CHICAGO — Polite and respectful punk Jimmy Arano “did the right thing” at a house party last weekend by slightly…