Drug Dealer’s 1000th Customer Wins Free Explanation of How the Government Really Works
TWIN FALLS, Idaho — A local drug dealer’s 1,000th customer was lucky enough to win a free explanation of how…
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Liam Stephenson
8 stories found
Man Buying Records at Target Also Buys Condoms to Make It Less Weird at Checkout
SAYVILLE, N.Y. — Local man Dave Greggory added a pack of condoms to his handbasket to distract from the fact…
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Indie Shazam Finds Song and Gatekeeps It From You
MOUNTAIN VIEW, Calif. — A new app called Sentry is being labeled as the industry's “Indie Shazam” and is capable…
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Alt Rock Band Hoping for a Big Hit So They Can Whine About Playing It
SEATTLE — Legendary underground band Vomit Asylum admitted they would love to break through to the mainstream with a song…
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Elvis Presley Rock & Roll Hall of Fame Exhibit to Steal Layout of African American History Museum
CLEVELAND — Officials at the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame’s Elvis Presley exhibit announced they will be copying the…
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Kid Who Can’t Buy Fireworks Legally Settles on Buying Assault Rifle
NEW ORLEANS — Local teenager Sam Carter purchased a fully automatic assault rifle after failing to legally obtain fireworks, sources…
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Record Store Bathroom Has “Staff Picks” Written Next to Certain Urinals
PORTLAND, Ore. — Local record store Death and Waxes added “staff pick” signs at certain urinals in their restroom to…
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So You Made Plans on Adderall: Here’s Five Ways To Fake Your Death
We’ve all been there. You took Adderall to clean your apartment without crying and now you’re slotted for thirteen different…
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